because the universe hates me

I've been tagged with another of these LJ things that you're supposed to do if any of your friends do. This time it's posting the current wallpaper on your computer. So here's mine...





Which is really rather depressing and I'm going to change it right now. Because whenever I do a vid, I make a wallpaper when I start to keep me motivated until I'm done. This one is screencaps and quotes from my fic/vid about the year that never was. Basically, UNIT delivers an encrypted file to Jack that was found in the Valiant computer along with a virus. If the Doctor's plan had failed, the Valiant would have gone down due to Torchwood sabotage. The file is a video letter to Jack, pretty much a group suicide note, because none of them expect to survive the mission, fully intending to be captured and killed while aboard the Valiant.

For those of you who didn't read my last post, this fic/vid died with my hard drive. Consider the bunny up for adoption. If anybody wants it, I still have most of the audio from the vid, since I made the message track first and that was actually part of my last backup.

Just a little PSA here about the importance of backing up your files. Because it's not a matter of IF your hard is going to die, it's a matter of WHEN. Seriously, people, trust me on that one.

*takes a moment to swear to high hell* I've just coined the phrase "gorram frelling frak" and am tempted to make that the title of my journal.

So basically, my D drive died. Not C, so I'm still up and running. Yeah, lucky me, those are two separate drives and not just partitions. However, three guesses as to where I keep my fic folder... No wait, two. Anybody requiring three gets to be smacked in the head.

Before anybody asks why I didn't back-up my files, shut up, because I did so do that, I'm not a complete moron. I just did it like a month or two ago. Yeah, my lazy bad.

So here's the casualty list:

TOMM: 9,000ish words (save for a short Jack/Ianto scene I e-mailed sarahjane6, which is still in my sent folder) including some utterly brilliant stuff about fortune cookies telling the team what to do - yes, seriously - it involved aliens and psychic paper and actually kinda made sense

TCIP: all of chapter 13 (well, my rewrite of 13 due to the first version being an ADD meds disaster) - I'm honestly considering moving directly to 14 and making that the Midas ring chapter, because I really want to write that particular scene, despite it doing nothing to progress the story plot or characters and would just be random filler

Detachment: outline ideas and pieces of a few scenes

untitled fic and vid about the year that never was: fic went bye-bye, vid mostly so - wasn't much, I'll likely not bother with going back to it and trash the plot bunny

missing scene fic from COE Day 2: I actually think I may have that in my sent folder as well due to mailing it to a friend, but I lost interest in it on Day 4 and so don't actually give a damn

I think that's all. My muse says it needs this CD in order to go on living...
Songs From Andrew Lloyd Webber's The Phantom Of The Opera (1993)
Why it wants that, I've no idea. Well, other than my watching PotO for the first time about a week ago. My whole life, I was so totally wrong with what I thought that story was about! I was certain it was Beauty and the Beast but set in sewer tunnels under an opera house. Whatever though, because I don't have money and am certainly not going to ask my local music store if they can order it for me.

Anyway, to wrap things up, my life sucks, and I'm now going to go kill myself in some creative and artistic way. No, honestly swear I'm not, nobody call the police or anything, please, because that really would be the answer to "how can this day get any worse?" Nothing more fun than a bunch of cops locking me up and taking away my shoe laces. I'm gonna go get ice cream is what I'm actually going to do.

The Oft-Mentioned Mile

fandom: Torchwood (maybe a bit of Dr Who crossover, maybe)
summary: the obligatory bodyswap fic
genre: likely more drama than comedy
rating: R (for swearing and sexual situations)
set late season 2, spoilers through "Something Borrowed"
pairings: Jack/Ianto (also some Tosh/Owen, Gwen/Rhys)


LJ cut: ( TOMM - part 1 )

Today I was finally smacked in the head by a friend who decided I needed a ST kink meme intervention, and I've been instructed to write the bodyswap fic that I "promised" I would do. Although for future clarification, when I say "somebody" should do something, I do not mean me, and I am not volunteering or promising to do said something.

Getting to the point, I spent my free time today (which wasn't much) starting the bodyswap fic. I know Detachment won the vote three to one, but well... I require death threats and such to be properly motivated. That or you've got to spark my muse by leaving a comment that simply cannot be ignored. Gotta say, sarahjane6 came very close. Nice try. And I'm not ignoring you guys, Detachment has switched status from abandoned back to active, meaning it's something I plan to resume if nobody else adopts it.

So anyway, next fic up will likely be "The Oft-Mentioned Mile" (working title), and I'll hopefully start posting it next weekend. It will probably be short, a bit crack!fic, a bit drama, and most likely way too much angst... but if I'm lucky, it will get me kick-started writing again.

It will be late season two, and the swap will be:

Jack --> Ianto
Ianto --> Jack
Gwen --> Owen
Owen --> Tosh
Tosh --> Gwen

If anybody has done this before, let me know, because if so I'll dump the bunny and switch to something else. Those of you who'd prefer Detachment, here's your chance to get it moved up a spot on the list.

So there's this thing going around LJ, and here are the rules:

1. Pick up to 10 OTP/OT3s.
2. Describe them in 15 words or less.
3. Have your f-list guess the pairing.

But everybody seems to be doing it by obvious description or job title. Such as "the captain and the head science officer" or "the captain and the logical alien" for Kirk/Spock. But why not use something like "I have been, and always shall be, your friend"? And for goodness sake, let's avoid the ones that could be ten thousand things, such as "the captain and the doctor" which I've seen a couple times. Because is that Jack and his right kind of Doctor, or possibly Jack/Owen, or Kirk/McCoy, Mal/Simon, Picard/Crusher, or even Sam Carter/Janet Fraiser??? I could go on.

So anyway, I'm gonna play, and to start off, I'll not be using "the captain and the teaboy."

1. not just a blip in time (hmm, that's just as obvious, isn't it?)
2. available... very
3. better with two
4. It's like filling her up with petrol, and off we go... into time... and space! (had to get one that was 15 words - lol)

Now some hard ones.

5. I just really love him, you know. Without condition. (damn, I can't think of a good one for this couple - I need a different 5)
5.2. untouchable (in a literal sense, and drat, that could still mean two different couples I've shipped)
6. the Seeker of Truth and the Mother Confessor (yeah, I said I wasn't gonna do that, but sue me, I needed one somebody might actually get - and sheesh, make that three that fit 5.2)
7. the big damn hero and his ambassador (well, at least I didn't say "the captain and the companion")
8. the hunter and the slayer (*shrug* nobody's gonna get that one no matter what I do)
9. I love you. / I know. (I did a book, so nobody fuss that I've tossed in a movie)
10. I may throw up on you.


Although if we do best PWP pairing, I'm gonna have to add Jack/Inara to the list, because wouldn't that just be the hottest sex EVER? Although maybe I'm the only one to have that crossover thought, because I've never come across anyone else who did.

So you all remember how I said I was gonna devote an hour a week to writing, well... okay, obviously I've been sucking at that so far. I need some inspiration, or a slap to the head, or possibly a co-writer to stare over my shoulder and make me focus.

Because I've no excuse, I have had a few free hours, but then a friend went "Hey, have you seen this Warehouse 13 show?" and I was all "No." Long story short, I'm now eagerly waiting for them to find Jules Vern's pen which writes the future.

And somebody else was like, "oh look, a STAR TREK XI KINK MEME!" To which I eyerolled, imagining lots of fic about Kirk and Spock and them using the entire chicken. But it's actually not so much just kink as prompts for everything, and I think I'm addicted (although I've not yet requested or filled anything yet). And OMG, but I think I ship McCoy/Kirk! WTF?

Anyway... back to my point (that being writing and Torchwood and I suppose either "Detachment" or that bodyswap fic because a friend pointed out that I *promised* to write one of those, although I seem to recall it being more of me saying *somebody* should do that). So basically, help! Because right now I think my brain is stranded on an away mission gone wrong, and it doesn't wanna come back.

I'm going to TRY to set aside an hour a week for writing and/or vidding, but my muse could use a little push to help it decide which idea to work on. So here's your chance to sway it one way or another. What do you want?

resume "They Come in Pairs"
actually end "Detachment"
write one of my ten ways Ianto came back life
Year That Never Was - PTSD for Jack
the obligatory bodyswap fic I've somehow not seen done in this fandom yet
crossover with Doctor Who - the death of Doctor 13
prompt a friend gave me - post season 2, theme "paralyzed"
another prompt - post season 2, theme "memories"
prompt again - season 1 or 2, "hell or high water"

something not from the list
something that should be done as a vid
something in a different fandom (such as Ginny is a horcrux or killing Robin Hood off in a different way)

For anybody who's wondering, I've taken down my "message to RTD" vid of my own free will, because while the vid was getting five-starred and favorited, the comments made me realize just how much anger was being directed at RTD, James Moran, and the BBC. I didn't intend that. Or maybe I did, and I apologize for that. There's a difference between passion for characters and hatred of writers. We're upset, yeah granted, but they are doing their jobs, and they scored some rather good ratings. Is it the way I hoped Torchwood would go, no, but it isn't my show, and nobody can please everyone. If I were writing it, I'm sure people would be on my case about everything I did wrong, too.

If there's a season 4, I likely won't watch, but not because I'm pissed at the writers or demand Ianto back (and Tosh and Owen) or am on strike against whatever, but simply that the direction the show has gone doesn't interest me anymore. Jack isn't the character I loved from Doctor Who, but I respect RTD's choices to take him on whatever hero's journey he wishes. And I just never cared for Gwen (no offense at all meant to Eve).

So to all the Torchwood crew, you guys have my respect, and I wish you well.

Having some fun with Doctor Who and Torchwood canon. This is my first "five ways" thing... and I used ten. *shrug* I'll get it right next time. This is the one way I didn't.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jy15r7pgfE

edit note: somebody just pointed out to me that this is "#10 - Most Viewed (Today) - Entertainment - Russia" on YouTube. LOL, cool!

Okay, everybody, we're all pissed. So here's the question: do we stay or run away? Show of hands. Who's for taking a massive dose of retcon and we happily continue to fic Torchwood in blissful denial? And who's for scattering to other fandoms? Anybody who votes to flee the fandom, please let me know which direction you head, okay? Because I quite like some of you, and maybe most of us can run to the same place.

As for me, I'm waiting to hear your thoughts before I decide. If most of you want to stay in the fandom and read fix-it fic or stories set before CoE, perhaps I'll stay and write them (or resume the ones I've already started), assuming we can get back into the mood after a good group hug and crying on each others shoulders. But if the majority of you are seeking new fandoms, I'm going as well, because I definitely don't want to stay alone.

This is just total shit. So is it over now, or what? Because where would Torchwood go from here? There is no Torchwood anymore, just Jack and Gwen. Jack, who isn't that likable of a person any longer, and who has lost everyone (his brother, grandson, lover... Tosh, Owen, Suzie...). And Gwen, who keeps having all these disgusting little moments with Jack (yeah, we're not blind, we see the Gwackish subtext) which would destroy Rhys if they went further, as though not bad enough she already cheated on him with Owen, so Gwen is not that likable of a person either.

So hell of a way to go out... with a whimper.

*adds Torchwood to my dead fandom list* Hell of a TV season. To think my week started on such a hopefull high note with The Dead Line and Day One. Can we trade, please, and kill Torchwood and Robin Hood and bring back Terminator: SCC and Pushing Daisies?

And I dunno, but maybe this is my sign off on this journal. I think I'll return to my other aliases and bluer skies. But to anybody reading this, I'll miss you all, and it's been fun. Thanks. If any of you want to adopt some Torchwood plot bunnies, just let me know. I've got a good half dozen outlines.

WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF?

WTF?

Okay, I'm done now.

So I'm thinking about MAYBE getting back into writing or vidding (although I likely don't have the time), but the question is... Torchwood or Harry Potter?

"The Dead Line" just made me go all warm and fuzzy Jack/Ianto fangirl, but a certain somebody (you know who you are) got me back into HP while I was rereading the fic "Mirror of Maybe" and then there's also the vid trailer "Harry Potter and the Eighth Horcrux" (http://aliasjanedoe.livejournal.com/2226.html) and like oh my god, I'm shipping horcrux!Harry/horcrux!Ginny inside my head now because I'm just twisted like that and somebody NEEDS to adopt that plot bunny who has time on their hands to write an epic.

But anyway, I'm torn, too many fandoms, not enough time.

I'm making this post for anybody else like me who didn't know about the radio play "The Dead Line." OMG!! How did I not know about this? It's like a really (really really really) great fic read by the actors, and Ianto's talk to Jack was just awwwwwww. It was exactly what I've wanted him to say on the show. Spot on, brilliant, and huge huge thanks to everybody involved in making it. So everybody go listen, because SQUEEEE! Now if only they would film it.

First off, I'm so sorry to do this, and part of me really doesn't want to, but it isn't fair of me to just leave you all hanging either. I'm abandoning "They Come in Pairs."

I hate doing so, because I love you guys (burning pitchforks and threats to hold your cats hostage and all - although wouldn't that work better if you were to kidnap *my* cat?). I'm not sure how I'll survive without fandom and writing.

No, this isn't about my writers block and ADD. I've stopped trying to treat that. Which seriously, nobody do that!! You risk putting yourself into serious depression and just don't! I stopped because I don't have medical insurance and recently broke my toe which is all the extra expense I can handle, and because I know I can deal with things without treatment. I did not make this decision because it was fracking with my ability to write, and I would not advise anybody do so for that reason.

So why am I calling it quits on the fic? Because I'm working three jobs currently (one full time and two part), so I literally do not have the time to write. This isn't likely to change until the end of the year. And maybe it's for the best that I don't, because the dark place TCIP was headed probably isn't the healthiest place for me to go right now anyway.

I'm still 100% Torchwood fangirl, just an out of loop one. And OMG delayed SQUEE about jealous Ianto in the last Dr Who ep and Jack's reply. Is it just me, or was that almost like monogamy from JACK??!! Or well, as close as is possible with him. That was so cute. Although where was the much needed and awaited Jack/Rose/Doctor talk?? She didn't know about Jack, and and and... Just AHHHHH! Where was *that* discussion?! Where?? And I wanted more with Sarah-Jane's part in the ep also. And for a ridiculously delayed WTF? Did the Doctor totally out the Master in that little Children in Need clip? I just about fell out of my chair. Maybe I took that beard/wife comment the wrong way, but was it seriously just me? Okay, rant over. No wait, the Medusa Cascade - I so thought that was building up to something bigger, something that had to do with the Doctor's name. Right, now I'm actually done. But I needed that, because all work and no play makes Jane a dull girl.

Anyway, thought you guys who are actually watching my journal deserved to hear from me and know what's up.

First off, this isn't actually a real fic, just my attempt to get over writer's block so that I can continue with "They Come in Pairs" before people hunt me down and kill me. That said, this story basically sucks, has no real plot, and no actual ending. Not beta'd either. It's just an exercise in aimlessly writing. You all have been warned.

Second off, this came about because while I was trying to convince my brain that, yes, it does still want to write (I finally decided to treat my ADHD because it's interfering with my job, and now I've completely lost my flow), my muse reminded me that I'd told somebody once upon a time that I was game for some Jack/Ianto chair fic. I'm sure this is NOT what they had in mind. I also had a friend complaining that while she read a lot of stories that mention safe words, she's never come across a fic where one was actually used. I'm sure this is also NOT what she meant either.


-----

Detachment

one-shot
PG-13/perhaps R (because of Jack and Ianto in an office building)
spoilers through "Something Borrowed"
Jack/Ianto


LJ cut: ( Detachment )

Jack/Ianto (mentions of Jack/Rose/Doctor and Ianto/Lisa in this part)
NC-17
set between 1x08 and 1x13


( They Come in Pairs - 12 )

Jack/Ianto (mentions of Ianto/Lisa in this part)
NC-17
set between 1x08 and 1x13


( They Come in Pairs - 11 )

Jack/Ianto
NC-17
set between 1x08 and 1x13


( They Come in Pairs - 10 )